The honeymoon

The honeymoon With her ankles peripheral in vision, The young man was set on his mission To have and to hold As in stories of old, Cementing their love with a frisson.

Charlie Spooner’s Whores

Charlie Spooner’s Whores Harley, flopping the moors Whilst chewing his doors Heard his wife, with arms bossing her crust, Serrating him bay, “That is not the white ray, You’re just making dashings of lust.”

Mrs Caesar

Mrs Caesar Emperor Julius Caesar Did a lot for his missus to please her, When she said, could they go To somewhere that had snow He bought her a giant chest freezer.

Telling the parents

Telling the parents She picked a quiet moment when all around was hushed, to say she’d fallen pregnant or was, more precisely, pushed.

Mixed Emotions

Mixed Emotions The cherry blossom’s on the tree, yet once again, it’s raining. I’m in good health, I’m Covid-free, I shouldn’t be complaining.

The Lower House

The Lower House Watching porn on his phone, in the House, not at home, he was bound to make six-o-clock News, following Sharon Stone slur, what next will occur to scandalise – nude PMQs? A conservative MP has been accused of watching porn on his phone whilst working. The Lower House: House of Commons, UK. Sharon Stone: A female MP was accused of behaving…

Artistic Party

Artistic Party The artists were having a party With painters from far and from near, They asked if Van Gogh would DJ it, As he had a very good ear.

Criticism

Criticism My ironing technique has been sliding, I’ve committed a bit of a clanger; Apparently, I should be gliding, Instead, I’m becoming a banger.

Gambling pensioner

Gambling Pensioner An american lady from Yonkers Became semi-professional at conkers. Her single intention, To double her pension Which everyone told her was bonkers.

Ambitious lady

Ambitious lady Her progress old fashioned But it was impassioned And never hurt anyone’s feelings; With barely a stop She rose to the top By becoming an expert on ceilings.