Posted on 3rd Nov 2021
The worst voice in Yorksher This is a tale about Hobbo, As related by Dauphy his pet, Please don't tell him that I told you Or he'll have me straight round to the vets. It 'appened when he were a schoolboy So, we're talking of fifty plus years, Folk lived in black and white houses And nob'dy 'ad heard of craft beers. Hobbo were still in short trousers, He can't 'ave been more nor sixteen, People 'ung on to their clobber, When you're brassic, it pays to be mean. Our story takes place in the classroom, With a teacher too fond of a clip Round the lug'oles for unruly pupils And a great 'airy wart on her lip. A musical test instigated To see who could sing and who c'un't, She'd taken a dislike to Hobbo And he guessed it were nowt but a stunt. She plonked out some notes on 'pianner, Said,sing one above, then one down, Marks out of ten were awarded And she turned Hobbo's world upside down. Most of the class got an average Score around about six, With our 'ero given a zero He knew the 'ole thing were a fix. Tha's got the worst voice in Yorksher She telled him in front of the class, Who's laughter drownded him muttering And tha's just an ugly, fat lass. For three lengthy months they all practised Their songs for an upcoming show, All of 'em with the exception Of embarrassed 'ero, Hobbo. Whilst his schoolmates perfected their singing 'Armonising and chiming, Not so, our tone deaf companion, Because he were restricted to miming. Teacher encouraged the others To mock till they bust into stitches A bully, an 'orrible lady, As Hobbo says, one of lifes bitches. Oh yes, it's a funny old story, Which in this day, would not be allowed To happen, it's discrimination Making people stand out from the crowd. If Hobbo were telling his version, He'd say, it were all a big hoot, And his confidence wasn't affected, Debatable, that point is moot. Whatever became of the teacher, Hobbo claims he doesn't care tuppence But that woman upset my old pal, And I 'ope that she got her comeuppance.
Category: Uncategorized Tagged: bullying, teaching
Posted on 18th Sep 2021
Scary Mary Scary boys, though scary, were not so bad as Mary, the girl in our class, who always played the ass at secondary school, the queen of all misrule. She did as she wanted, never got taunted, till a boy thought he might stand up for his rights, so, she gave him a hiding, left his ear in a siding. Even our teacher found nothing could reach her, she was left on the shelf, a law to herself. What would become of our troublesome chum? I looked in her eye today, sweet as pie. she begged me for change. I thought how sad, how strange, drugs don't make you scary, but lonely and wary.
Category: Uncategorized Tagged: bullying, drugs
Posted on 7th Dec 2020
Misconception Here lies the body Of little Big Ears Murdered by Noddy And bullied for years.
I’m pleased with this. It popped into my head yesterday and gave me a good chuckle, until I started thinking of the darker imagery behind it.
Hobbo
Category: Uncategorized Tagged: bullying, misconception