Yorksher clogs

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
Yorksher Clogs 
(To blue suede shoes by Carl Perkins)

Well it's one for the Yorksher,
Two for the show,
Three get my flat cap,
Then go, now go.

But don't you step on my Yorksher clogs,
Well you can do anything but
Stay off of my Yorksher clogs.

Well, you can nick the car, kick the cat,
Steal the missus, yes I'll give you that,
Do whatever, with your pit bull dogs,
But uh oh buddy, stay off of my clogs.

Don't you, step on my Yorksher clogs,
You can do anything but
Stay off of my Yorksher clogs,
Let's go, Tykes (make the pudding).

You can spoil my tools, burn my shed,
Use me wireless till the battery's dead,
Do whatever, with your pit bull dogs,
But uh oh buddy, stay off of my clogs.

Don't you, step on my Yorksher clogs,
You can do anything,
But stay off of my Yorksher clogs,
Ey up!

Well it's one for the Yorksher,
Two for the show,
Three get my flat cap,
Then go, now go.

But don't you step on my Yorksher clogs,
Well you can do anything but
Stay off of my Yorksher clogs.

York, York, Yorksher clogs, oh missus!
York, York, Yorksher clogs, ey up!
York, York, Yorksher clogs, oh missus!
York, York, Yorksher clogs,
You can do anything but
Stay off of my Yorksher clogs.

Wordsworth’s Idea

Photo by David Jakab on Pexels.com
Wordsworth's Idea

I wondered, only half aloud
If I had paid my fuel bills,
Then all at once, there lifts a cloud,
I'll put them in the post, with Jill's.
And if they're fake, or parodies,
I'll owe no one, and live at ease.

Vaccination Song

Photo by Alvin Visuals on Pexels.com
Vaccination Song
(Jabbing by Bob Marley and Hobbo)

Ooh! Ouch! Careful!

Careful!

We're jabbin'
I wanna jab it, do you?
We're jabbin',jabbin',
And I hope you get jabbin' too.

We're jabbin'
To think that jabbin' was for flu in the past
We're jabbin'
And I hope this jab is gonna last.

We're jabbin'
Jabbin'
Jabbin'
Jabbin'
Jabbin'

Now we're jabbin' to protect NHS
We're jabbin'
Jabbin'
Jabbin'
Jabbin'
Now we're jabbin' our way outta this mess.

Ouch, yeah!

We're jabbin'
I wanna jab it, do you?
We're jabbin', jabbin'
And I hope you get jabbin' too.

Jab's about safety, a truth I cannot hide
To keep you safe outside
Health that now exist, respect I can't resist,
Jab in my arm, ouch, yea-ea-yeah!

We're jabbin'
I wanna jab it, do you?
We're jabbin', jabbin'
And I hope you get jabbin' too.

We're jabbin'
To think that jabbin' was for flu in the past
We're jabbin'
And I hope this jab is gonna last.

We're jabbin'
Jabbin'
Jabbin'
Jabbin'

Now we're jabbin' to protect NHS
We're jabbin
Jabbin'
Jabbin'
Jabbin.
Now we're jabbin' our way outta this mess.

Ouch, yeah!

We're jabbin'
I wanna jab it, do you?
We're jabbin', jabbin'
And I hope you get jabbin' too.

We're jabbin'
Jabbin'
Jabbin'
Jabbin'
I wanna jab it, do you?
We're jabbin', jabbin'
And I hope you get jabbin' too.

We're jabbin'
We're jabbin'
We're jabbin'
We're jabbin'
Ouch, yeah!

The Crowing Cock

Photo by samer daboul on Pexels.com
The Crowing Cock
A parody of Jaberwocky
by Lewis Carroll

Twas payday, and the slimy toads,
Drink fire and gamble in the snug:
All flimsy were their heavy loads,
And mum released the drug.

Beware the Crowing Cock my son!
The beak that pecks, the feet that scratch!
Beware the Spotsport bird, it's won
A famous cricket match.

He took his sabre light in hand:
Three days his little toe was caught-
So rested he in The Old Oak Tree,
And drank a pint in thought.

And as in mighty mood he sat,
The Crowing Cock, with wattle raised,
Burst in the pub with cricket bat,
W.G.Grace be praised.

Three, four! Three four! And at the door
The sabre light went in and out.
And from the floor, a mighty roar,
"Crowing Cock-It's your shout!"

"And hast thou tamed the Crowing Cock?
Give me a hug, my beastie boy!
Oh fanlous say, De Doo, De Day!
My bosom weeps for joy."

Twas payday and the slimy toads
Drink fire and gamble in the snug:
All flimsy were their heavy loads,
And mum released the drug.

A cautionary tale

Photo by Engin Akyurt on Pexels.com
A cautionary tale

In Yorksher they had 'reffy rendrum
About whither to go it alone
And since most of 'tykes, were all forrit
The republic of Yorksher were born.

First job, it were finding a boss type
Nessy tated all 'ands to the pump
They scoured the cobbles of Bradford
To find billionairess, Donna Crump.

The slogan,'Mek Yorksher great ag'in
Was summat they an't 'eard in years
And the prospect of more dry stone walling
'Ad grown men, crying into their beers.

On 'first day, she signed loads of papers
Twelve before going to bed
Some of it really important
And some, what she even 'ad read.

At first it were all hunky dory
She built up considerable funds
By scrapping the decimal system
And printing their own Yorksher punds.

Soon, some were beginning to doubt her
Too big fer 'er boots, too offhand
To establish 'erself as 'world leader
She shook, Mayor of Lancashire's 'and.

About twelve months 'afore re-election
The Black Pudding Plague swept the Dales
But Donna were sniffy about it
Said it only killed people from Wales.

Her supporters were told not to worry
And Donna refused to wear 'mask
Sadly, thousands who listened to 'lady
Were carted away in a casque.

Her four years in office passed quickly
What with eatin' tinned peaches and such
When they put an old man up ag'in her
Well, Donna thought that a bit much.

The vote were about fifty-fifty
Wi' towns going one way, then t'other
When it looked like t'old feller 'ad edged it
Crump 'ad to ring up 'er big brother.

Find me a shed load of voters
Don't care who, don't care how
And as for the votes fer the old bloke
Well they shouldn't count anyhow.

The countin' dragged on fer a month
T'old feller were given a win
But Crump were as stubborn as pigshit
Dug 'er heels in, and wouldn't give in.

Crump supporters, invaded the town 'all
Wi' a noise fit to wekken the queen up
They med such a mess wi' their boots on
It took 'em all weekend, to clean up.

Eventually, sense were restored though
And Yorksher came back into 'fold
As a warning to future republics
Is this little parody told.
%d bloggers like this: