Rivers of love

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Rivers of love

Loving is easy
Along the Zambezi
But it's slower and sexy
On the banks of the Yangtze.

Toy romance

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Toy romance

My teddy bear
Is so threadbare
I call him Freddy Teddy.
He loves my doll,
Imperfect Poll,
In fact, they're going steady.

A night in

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A night in
Jeremy took Joanne skating
Suggesting afterwards, they ate in;
With the hope, it might mean mating.

Agreeing, Joanne thought a date in
Could lead to romance worth 'A' rating
Deliveroo girl though was late in

Kept the young couple a-waiting,
Expecting for this, a berating
Received instead but mild placating.

Soon as they'd done masticating,
Parents came home, relegating
Their plans to the bin, frustrating

Three reasons

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Three reasons

Three single mothers
Met a trio of brothers,
Marrying quick as a flash;
One for romance,
One took a chance
And one, who was gay, for the cash.

Two Sugars

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Two Sugars
She shimmied about in her negligee,
Seductively giving her hips a sway.
"I'm feeling romantic," she pouted.
Husband looked up, said,"Don't doubt it,
But this is a good book I'm reading
Before footy, and 'ferrets need feeding.
And it's not superman that you've wed,
So, make me a cuppa instead.

Courting, Yorksher style

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Courting, Yorksher style

She breathed down me neck,
I thought, 'Flippin' 'eck.
I am in wi' a shout,'
So, I bought 'er a stout.

The Old Romantic

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The Old Romantic

Oh, I'm a big soft touch
Now that I'm wiser, older
I love my wife so much
I very nearly told her.
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