Secret recipe

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Secret recipe

Remembering to make mum's sauce squeezier,
Huge sales made her life so much easier.
A fortune amassed
But that didn't last
The day she developed amnesia.

The Millionaire

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The Millionaire

When she checked the invoice
For her third, gold Rolls Royce,
The salesman had hiked his commission,
So she sent round a team,
Who shattered his dream
and removed his con-rod with precision.

That’s rich

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That's rich

Jeff Bezos has a bob or two
and Musk is doing not bad too,
Arnault's rolling in french bunce,
Bill gates is no soft money dunce,
Zuckerberg could pay the way
for Putin on a rainy day.
Hamilton has loads of trophies,
me, I'm skint, but I've got Dauphy.

Adele graces lower tiers,
Posh and Becks have money fears,
Boris Johnson struggles by,
the Queen's enough to make you cry,
Streisand's built melodic cash,
and Paul McCartney's quite a stash.
I may not have their filthy lucre
but Mrs H. is my Manuka.

A flutter

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A flutter

Ellie, in her nightie,
Silver lady, flighty,
A most prestigious mascot.
Everything is phoney,
I lost it on a pony
Which came in last at Ascot.

Priorities

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Priorities

The world's full of faux millionaires,
Who try to impress with their airs
And graces, who constantly swank
Of how much they have in the bank,
Who select only privileged mates
And have nothing to do with estates,
Unless it's a property they own
And can boast of how much it's grown.

Whose interests are only compound,
And the likes of which usually are found
Exclusively in the best seats
At sporting events and such treats,
Where they sit and hold court, and they brag
Of their jets and their ill gotten swag,
Granted knighthoods for whom they might know
From Cambridge or Oxford, or even Harrow.

Look at me, see my wealth, what I've got
My luxury cars and my yacht.
They work every hour God sends
To accumulate more and more spends,
Which usually results in, of course
A history of splits and divorce,
So, for all they amass and accrue
I trump the whole lot, I've got you.

Folly

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Folly

Standing atop of a hill,
Moody, magnificent, still.
Outsize penis, erect, with a view,
Boast, I can piss further than you.
These phallic symbols immense,
Speak of more money than sense.

Folly: A building in the UK with no actual purpose other than to demonstrate wealth. Usually stone built, phallic shaped and situated on top of a hill.

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